This is a continuation of Daniel’s and my story. Click on the “Our Story” tag for context.
Thankfully, when Daniel said that he loved me, he didn’t expect an immediate response from me.
He wouldn’t have gotten it even if he did expect it. I was flabbergasted.
Elisabeth Elliot’s words from Passion and Purity were running through my mind:
“My father counseled his four sons never to say, ‘I love you’ to a woman until they were ready to follow immediately with ‘Will you marry me?'”
Daniel had said “I love you.” He had not asked me to marry him. He had said he wanted to marry me someday.
He loved me?
Wasn’t it a little sudden for that? How could he love me? Did he really know me well enough to love me? Surely he just hadn’t seen enough to know that he didn’t really love me.
But I trusted Daniel, I loved Daniel. I couldn’t pooh-pooh what he’d just said, couldn’t presume that he was just throwing out meaningless words for emotions’ sake.
He said he loved me.
The thoughts kept whirling and twirling as Daniel continued speaking.
When he stopped, my lips spoke a patent untruth:
“I think I love you too.”
This, from the girl who’d been telling God and her journal all week that she loved Daniel. This, from the girl who’d been entreating God to tell her whether she would marry Daniel.
Now, faced with his confession of love for her, she replies “I think I love you too”?
I did.
In my defense, I’d been questioning my own capability to love all week as well. How did I know this was not mere infatuation? I asked myself. Did I even know him well enough to love him?
And saying “I love you” has never been something that comes particularly easy to me. I’m not one of those types who tacks an “I love you” at the end of every phone conversation.
This was something new, something new entirely for me.
So you can’t blame me for being shy (can you?)
Then again, a third possible explanation for my half-truth response could be that I’d been humming an old Partridge family tune all week long:
“I think I love you
So what am I so afraid of?”
Whatever the exact reason, I told him I thought I loved him.
Whether he caught it or not, he didn’t say anything about my noncommittal response.
What exactly came next, I’m not sure, but eventually I asked Daniel: “So, does this mean that I’m your… girlfriend?”
“I think I love you” is a fair response. You were putting thought behind it. I loved your ending question. hahaha!
I have been sitting here reading your last seven posts smiling from ear to ear. People walking by my office are thinking I am off my nut! LOL! This is such a wonderful time in your life and I love it that you are sharing it with your friends here. I don’t get by every day but I am sure to always get caught up! I will be traveling through your area next week and as I track the weather and such I think about YOU! God bless and I can’t wait to hear the rest of the story!