Books

Categories What's on Your Nightstand?

Nightstand (April 2015)

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Tirzah Mae’s routine (and mine by extension) is still recovering from our weeklong trip to Lincoln last month, which has meant that I’ve got a fair bit of reading and pretty much nothing else done this month.

Tirzah Mae in a Sunhat

Fiction read this month:

  • Longbourn by Jo Baker
    A tale of the domestic help at Longbourn, home of the Bennets (of Pride and Prejudice fame). I would have loved to have recommended this book, with it’s intriguing premise and generally engaging story (after the first few chapters). Unfortunately, the lewd language, sexual immorality, and otherwise inappropriate content sprinkled throughout makes me unable to recommend it.
  • 1984 by George Orwell
    A fascinating dystopia read with the Reading to Know Classics Bookclub and reviewed here.
  • 6 picture books author last name BROWN
  • 1 board book by Sandra Boynton

First stack of library returns

Nonfiction read this month:

Books about building a home:

  • The Complete Guide to Building Your Home for Less by Michael Conroy
  • What not to Build by Sandra Edelman, Judy Gaman, and Robby Reid
  • Old-House Dictionary by Steven J. Phillips
  • 3 House Plan Books

Second stack of library returns

Other nonfiction:

  • Annable’s Treasury of Literary Teasers by H.D. Annable
    A volume full of question-and-answer-style literary trivia. I love that the answers to questions were on the very next page (questions on page 1, answers on page 2 so you flipped just one page to get the answers). I hated that I felt like an absolute literary dunce trying to answer the questions.
  • I was a Really Good Mom before I had Kids by Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile
    A good book about loving motherhood as much as you love your children. I reviewed it in greater detail earlier this month.
  • She is Mine by Stephanie Fast
    A gripping autobiography of the child of a Korean woman and an American serviceman, abandoned early in life and forced to fend for herself. I definitely recommend it (and will be reviewing it more fully soon.)
  • The Layman’s Bible Commentary: Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Haggai, Zechariah, Malachi by James H. Gailey, Jr.
    Having had one good experience with The Layman’s Bible Commentary, I keep checking out volume after volume to use in conjunction with my personal Bible reading. Unfortunately, this volume goes on the list with others as one in which the author undermines the inspiration of Scripture by presuming all sorts of cobbled together edits of Scripture to produce the finished work, despite the clear reading of the text indicating that, well, these are the words of a specific prophet. Disappointing.
  • Merry Christmas, America! by Bruce Littlefield
    Photos of extravagent Christmas light displays across America – along with stories from the people who create the displays (mostly private homeowners.) A lot of the displays are too gaudy for my taste, but they’re always interesting, as are the stories behind them.
  • Kansas Impressions by Steve Mulligan and Michael Snell
    As a lifelong resident of the Great Plains, I’ve always despised those who dismiss Nebraska or Kansas with a “nothing to see here, move along.” We may not have mountains or oceans, but the plains have their own gentle beauty (perhaps this is one of the reasons why I love Laura Ingalls Wilder’s lovely stories of pioneering in the plains?) Kansas Impressions is a book packed full of beautiful Kansas scenes. If you’ve been inclined to disparage your own state (if you’re a Kansan) or to roll your eyes and not even bother to look for a stop as you drive through Kansas, you should take a look at this book – and see Kansas through new eyes.
  • The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers by Jack Newman and Teresa Pitman
    Newman is one of the foremost experts in breastfeeding medicine – and I love the way he lets his voice come out in this informative and practical book. It won’t be for everyone, but I did write up some comments on one passage here (regarding whether breastfeeding should be considered the norm or the ideal “best”.)
  • Quick, Cheap Comfort Food by Victoria Shearer
    Over-reliance on convenience items (especially seasoning packets) meant there were only a half dozen or so recipes I found interesting. I tried a couple, which weren’t bad. Skippable.
  • The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer
    Read with last month’s Reading to Know Classics Bookclub, it took me forever to get my review up.

Don’t forget to drop by 5 Minutes 4 Books to see what others are reading this month!

What's on Your Nightstand?

Categories Book Reviews

Book Review: 1984 by George Orwell

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Who isn’t familiar with the phrase “Big Brother is always watching”?

It’s a phrase that’s entered into common parlance, quoted by people from all across the political spectrum. Actually, one thing ties together the frequent quoters – they’re generally Chicken Littles.

Okay, okay. That’s maybe a bit extreme. But the doomsday nature of those who quote Orwell’s famous slogan made me apprehensive as I started reading this novel. I continued on with this apprehensiveness for about the first third of the book. I love Orwell’s writing, loved how the story was drawing me in, loved his dystopia. And I thought, “How will I ever be able to discuss this with anyone? This is going to bring every ‘America is going to hell in a handbasket’ out of the woodwork.”

Then the story progressed and I lost myself into it, devouring it in just a few days.

It was an engaging story. I felt for Winston, the main character. I felt betrayed, heartbroken at the twist at the end. I contemplated the dreariness, not just of life under a completely totalitarian regime, but of life without Truth (with a capital T). You see, Winston dreamed of love and of freedom – both wonderful things, bits of eternity set within our heart. But the biggest hole in Winston’s life, the chasm so large he couldn’t even peer into its depths, was his lack of God.

Big Brother wanted to narrow his perspective. They wanted to narrow language so he couldn’t think anything they didn’t want him to think, wanted to narrow his dreams so that he wouldn’t look to anything beyond the now. They wanted to channel all his emotion into one thing and one thing only – love for Big Brother and hate for whoever was the enemy at the time (and had always been the enemy).

In a way, Big Brother succeeded, even while Winston was dreaming of love (and carrying on an affair), even while Winston was dreaming of freedom (and joining a revolutionary society). Winston wasn’t so narrowed that he could not dream of life outside of Big Brother’s control – but he was so narrowed that he never even dreamed of a Life (with a capital L) that could make him free even under Big Brother’s eye.

I’m still apprehensive about discussing 1984, still fear the doomsdayers. Truth is, this nation, just like every other nation has ebbs and flows. Freedom never lasts long, and even while it lasts, it is often more illusory than we make it out to be. And political freedom, as much as I love it and desire it and want to fight for it, is only one small thing.

One can be politically free, can be free from the “thought police”, can be able to live one’s life in peace and still have just as empty a life as Winston Smith. And one can be politically bound, can be under physical and emotional and mental persecution because of one’s beliefs, can be tortured in this life and still be absolutely free.

Because freedom isn’t political, it’s spiritual. And God is bigger than every Big Brother.

That’s what I came out of 1984 with – a conviction that the solution to totalitarianism is not democracy or republicanism (neither in the party sense or the form of government sense), the solution to totalitarianism is Christ.

Rating: 5 stars
Category: Dystopian fiction
Synopsis: Winston Smith dreams of a life outside of Big Brother’s totalitarian regime – and tries find it.
Recommendation: Engaging, thought-provoking, and on every reading list in the country (for good reason).

I read this as a part of Carrie’s Reading to Know Classic Bookclub.

Categories Book Reviews

Book Review: The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer

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One can’t read A.W. Tozer’s The Pursuit of God without grappling with the question of knowledge of God versus experiencing God. It’s the central theme of the book.

Tozer argues that it is insufficient to simply know about God or to pursue knowledge about God – but that one must pursue God Himself and experiences with God.

I agree.

The difficulty comes in when we start to make one exclusive of the other. When we start to think that pursuing God means not pursuing knowledge of God. When we start thinking that knowing about God precludes experiencing God.

And that’s exactly what Tozer seems to do.

It’s hard for me to put my thoughts about this book into words because my thoughts are so mixed. Certain passages in this book had me nodding my head and saying amen, some even brought tears to my eyes, so true and so profound they were.

“…Faith is the gaze of a soul upon a saving God….

Believing, then, is directing the heart’s attention to Jesus. It is lifting the mind to ‘Behold the Lamb of God’ (John 1:29) and never ceasing that beholding for the rest of our lives.”

I love it – and Scripture testifies to it.

But the passage I just quoted is a part of a thought experiment in which Tozer asks what an “intelligent, plain man, untaught in the truths of Christianity” would think upon reading the Scriptures. This thought experiment is a part of Tozer’s regular derision of education in the truths of Christianity and of those who seek doctrinal truth.

I despise his derision.

Much of my mixed opinion of this book probably comes from having belonged to churches that belonged to either of these camps. I spent my teenage years in a church that explicitly or implicitly valued experiences with God over knowledge of God. There I saw (and experienced) great passion for God and willingness to do God’s will – coupled with a tendency to be pushed to and fro with every wind and wave of doctrine and to lose faith when experience wasn’t forthcoming. Now, I belong to a church (and more generally, to a doctrinal camp) that explicitly or implicitly values knowledge of God and right theology over experience. Here, I see a great passion to understand the word and to trust what God has spoken – couple with a tendency
to value right thinking over right living and to draw the lines of orthodoxy so narrowly as to exclude most of the Christian world.

Reading The Pursuit of God reminded made to long for and delight in the experience of my youth – but Tozer’s animosity towards training in theology, really towards any Biblical education besides a man and his Bible in a closet, made me thankful to belong to a church and a doctrinal camp that values education.

Because what Tozer misses is that the more you know, the greater you can appreciate. Knowing about justification doesn’t keep you from experiencing a right relationship with God – in fact, it deepens your ability to experience that relationship, because you understand by faith what you don’t always feel. And often, knowing and understanding by faith leads to experiencing.

So, very mixed thoughts and feelings towards this book – so much so that I can’t really write my usual end-of-the-book-review synopsis and recommendation. Sorry!

I read this as a part of Carrie’s Reading to Know Classic Bookclub. To read more thoughts on the book, check out the March summary post.

Categories Book Reviews

Book Review: I was a Really Good Mom before I had Kids by Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile

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Are you tired of scrolling through the Facebook newsfeed and Pinterest front page, feeling more and more like a failure at motherhood? Have playdates become torture as you learn from other mothers yet another thing good mothers simply MUST be doing? Do you wince as you set the store-bought cupcakes you swore you’d never purchase next to another mom’s fancy homemade cookies on the Bible study snack table?

If so, you might find Ashworth and Nobile’s I was a Really Good Mom before I had Kids a helpful perspective-check.

When I first picked up this book, I figured it must be a memoir, full of stories of a mother failing to live up to her expectations. Alas, a memoir it is not – but despite not being what I expected, I enjoyed and appreciated this book.

Ashworth and Nobile found for themselves that motherhood wasn’t at all what they expected, and got tired of feeling so… defeated … as mothers. They didn’t feel at all the happy, perfect, “good” moms that every other woman seemed to be. They wondered if they were the only ones who felt this way – and they set out to find out the truth about those other mothers.

They interviewed hundreds of mothers and discovered that they weren’t the only women who felt like failures as mothers. They discovered that more mothers than not “love their children, but not being mothers” – and they set out to write a book to help women learn to love motherhood as much as they love their children.

Me with book "I was a Good Mom Before I had Kids"

The book goes through a series of steps to help moms do just that: align their expectations with reality, make peace with their choices, lose the judgment, let go of the guilt, communicate with their husbands, take time for themselves, learn to say no, and live in the moment.

Each step has its own chapter, which begins with a tongue in cheek quiz, such as the one that asks you to “rank these questions in order of bitchiness” and offers “That’s so cute – he has Spider-Man shoes and a Spider-Man lunch box. Does he watch a lot of TV?” as one of the options. After each chapter, the authors offer several action items to help mothers work on the topic broached by that chapter.

While the general concept of this book is not new (there are certainly dozens if not hundreds of books and articles and blog posts on the same subject), I feel like the authors did a good job at creating balance within their book. It seems to me that articles I’ve read in this category tend to fall into two different camps: the you’ve-got-to-take-care-of-yourself camp and the you’ve-got-to-lose-yourself-in-your-child camp.

The you’ve-got-to-take-care-of-yourself camp elaborates a series of self-care rituals that mothers ought to engage in so as not to become bitter over motherhood. Mothers should take time to go to the spa to get a massage or their nails done. They should work out daily. They should eat healthy. These articles tell moms that they need to do these things for themselves – and for their kids. Because a mom who doesn’t take care of herself isn’t good for her kids. The authors of this book discuss the need for mothers to take time for themselves (and for the same reason), but instead of giving another list of things mothers ought to do (and therefore feel like failures for not doing), they encourage mothers to think through and find out what things make them into “a person they enjoy being with”. The authors acknowledge that motherhood may change the things that women find enjoyable – and that’s OKAY. Maybe crafts used to energize you, but now facing the prospect of cleaning up after crafting makes you cringe. Maybe you used to think seeing movies in a theatre was pointless – but now the thought of being able to be in a dark room with no one talking to you is your idea of bliss. That’s OKAY. The important thing is finding out what makes you tick where you’re at now, and finding some way of incorporating that into your life.

In contrast, the you’ve-got-to-lose-yourself-in-your-child camp argues that mothers spend way too much time worrying about the laundry and the dishes and the myriads of things that need to get done – and says that what mothers really need to do is recognize that their children have only one childhood and it should be spent cuddling/playing/talking/reading/exploring with their mothers. So moms should just be okay with the dishes and laundry not being done, meals not being prepared, errands never run, etc. This perspective also tends to make moms feel like failures – because, try as they like, they still can’t feel good about mountains of laundry and unwashed dishes and unmade meals. The authors of I was a good mom address this topic as well – “live in the moment” and “align your expectations” – but they do so in a way that helps moms think through what really is important to them and in a way that acknowledges that mothers will never be able to completely “drop everything.”

In short, I highly recommend this book to mothers who feel overwhelmed by the task of mothering. While I’ve not yet dealt with many of the frustrations discussed in this title, I’ve certainly discovered the need to adjust my expectations since becoming a mother.

As a short caveat, this book is not written from a Christian perspective and there is some inappropriate language found within. Additionally, while the authors do a decent job of encouraging women to understand their husbands’ perspectives in parenting and to communicate well with their husbands, some of the quotes from the women they interviewed convey highly unhealthy attitudes towards husbands.

Rating: 4 stars
Category: Mothering
Synopsis: The authors encourage moms to learn to enjoy motherhood by letting go of unrealistic expectations and developing healthy attitudes and behaviors for mothering.
Recommendation: Recommended to mothers who are struggling with mommy guilt, fighting in the mommy wars (or wishing they could get out of the crossfire), or who are just plain overwhelmed by mothering.

Categories What's on Your Nightstand?

Nightstand (March 2015)

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Reading through my list here in preparation for publishing, I see that I read quite a bit more this month than I had realized. Yay!

What's on my Nightstand in March

Fiction read this month:

  • Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
    I read Heather’s pick for last month’s Reading to Know Classics Bookclub and wrote some reflections on what “the heart of darkness” refers to.
  • The Nonesuch by Georgette Heyer
    I continue to enjoy Heyer’s books – they’re one of my favorite escape-novels. In this one, I rather fell in love with the ideal Miss Trent (and wrote about it, of course!)
  • The Battle for Skandia by John Flanagan
    I continue to very much enjoy the Ranger’s Apprentice series. This one goes to new heights of excitement when Will and company are called upon to assist the Skandians (Scandinavians) in fighting off the Temujai (the Mongol horde).
  • The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin
    I read this with my in real life book club and look forward to discussing it this Thursday. This is a readers novel, full of references to other works – although I didn’t notice the parallels with George Eliot’s Silas Marneruntil my husband, who is reading it on my recommendation, pointed it out. Read my full review here.
  • Tom Thumb: Grimms’ Tales retold by Eric Carle
    Very nice retellings of four of Grimms’ Tales, accompanied by Carle’s characteristic illustrations. I borrowed this from the library, but I’d like to own a copy.
  • The Barefoot Book of Mother and Son Tales retold by Josephine Evetts-Secker
    An interesting collection of folk tales from around the world. I was a bit disappointed with how the author retells the Grimm Brothers’ “Hans in Luck” (mainly, leaving out the very last few lines about how the boy recounted his great luck to his mother) and I didn’t at all like how the story of Moses was told (as a tall-tale with extrabiblical and anti-biblical details.) But most of the ten stories were entertaining.
  • 5 picture books author last name BROKAMP to BROWN
  • 4 board books by Sandra Boynton
    I like her. I like her a lot.

More on my Nightstand in March

Nonfiction read this month:

Books about Parenting:

  • Dad is Fat by Jim Gaffigan
    Our library (Wichita’s Central library) has an abismal collection of audiobooks, and Jim Gaffigan’s Dad is Fat was one of the three that caught my eye before we left to visit our family in Lincoln. It was the one of the three that Daniel was interested in, so we listened to it on our way up (and down). In general, I enjoy Gaffigan’s humor and enjoyed listening to this book, although I’d heard many of the anecdotes already from watching him on YouTube. Gaffigan is widely considered to be “family-friendly” (something he makes fun of), but this book did include a few expletives.
  • The Wonder Weeks by Hetty van de Rigt and Frans Plooij
    Discusses how infants and toddlers go through predictable patterns of fussiness associated with leaps in mental development – and how parents can assist their children through these leaps. I found this massively helpful – it kept me focused on development instead of frustration when Tirzah Mae went through her first three “wonder weeks” (at 5, 8, and 12 weeks corrected for prematurity – so 13, 16, and 20 for her.)
  • Retro Baby by Anne Zachary
    Written by an occupational therapist, this book is all about gear-free ways to play with your infant – along with literally hundreds of reminders to only put a child to sleep on her back in a crib, to give her plenty of supervised tummy time, and to avoid putting baby in a container (swing, bouncy seat, or carrier) for more than a half an hour a day. I think I would have enjoyed this a lot more if I’d have started reading it now (when I can actually do some of the activities with Tirzah Mae) versus three months ago (when only the aforementioned warnings were really pertinent due to her stage of development.) Very nice activity ideas, pertinent warnings – but probably unrealistic (For example – sometimes I place Tirzah Mae on her tummy unsupervised while I fold laundry. If she falls asleep in her swing, I’m not going to wake her up to move her to the bassinet. And if making dinner takes longer than 30 minutes? She’s going to spend more than 30 minutes in her bouncy seat. Also, yep, we’ve done the cosleeping thing.)

Books about Houses:

  • Tips and Traps When Building Your Home by Robert Irwin
    Helpful look at the process of building your own home – along with tips for getting things done right and warnings to avoid doing things wrong :-)
  • 500 Bungalows by Douglas Keister
    It almost feels wrong to list this among the books I’ve read – because, apart from the introduction, it contains only photographs and locations. The entire book consists of photographs of bungalows from around the country. Quite a few were from my hometown, Lincoln Nebraska – and I found it interesting that I tended to like those houses more than the ones from, say, California (the southern houses generally have flatter roofs, since they don’t need to deal with heavy snow loads – and I’m just not a fan.)

Other nonfiction:

  • Christmas in Canada and
    Christmas in France by World Book
    Who says you can only read about Christmas in December?
  • The VBAC Companion by Diane Korte
    I am reading all I can, hoping to have a successful VBAC the next time around. This was a good resources – and one I’d definitely recommend to others, but it didn’t quite meet my expectations (mostly because I already have a very supportive OB and midwife and don’t really need help finding ones.) Read my full review here.

Books currently in progress

Currently reading:

  • I was a Really Good Mom before I had Kids by Trisha Ashworth and Amy Noble
    A little different than what I expected – but overall a pretty good book along the lines of getting rid of mommy guilt and having reasonable expectations in mothering. I recommended it to my sister-in-law (who’s much more in the throughs of mothering than I, with a three year old, a two year old and one on the way!).
  • Sleep: The Brazelton Way by T. Berry Brazelton and Joshua D. Sparrow
    Because Tirzah Mae is 5 months old (3 once corrected) and it’s time to start being intentional about sleep.
  • Give Them Grace by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessic Thompson
    Reading and discussing with my sister-in-law. At the end of the first section, I think some of the examples are on the sermonizing side – but I agree completely with the need to fall upon God’s grace in parenting, not on our wonderful parenting techniques. If there’s one thing I’ve learned so far, it’s that it’s only by God’s grace that our children will ever be “good” (or that we’ll ever be “good parents”.)
  • Vaginal Birth After Cesarean: The Smart Woman’s Guide to VBAC by Elizabeth Kaufmann
    One chapter in, it’s already obvious this author has a chip on her shoulder and is NOT pro-VBAC.
  • The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers by Jack Newman and Teresa Pitman
    Newman is one of the foremost experts in breastfeeding medicine – and I love the way he lets his voice come out in this informative and practical book. It won’t be for everyone, but I did write up some comments on one passage here (regarding whether breastfeeding should be considered the norm or the ideal “best”.)
  • The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer
    Reading for this month’s Reading to Know book club – I agree with Barbara’s liking AND Carrie’s disliking. (Oh my!) Will write more when finished.

Don’t forget to drop by 5 Minutes 4 Books to see what others are reading this month!

What's on Your Nightstand?

Categories Book Reviews

Book Review: The VBAC Companion by Diana Korte

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I’m sure it will come as a total shock to my readers – but I’m hoping for a vaginal birth the next time around.

I know, I know. You’re having a hard time wrapping your head around it.

Truth is, even if I weren’t all about natural childbirth and minimal interventions and maximizing chances at successfully establishing breastfeeding (all good cases for vaginal birth after c-section, or VBAC), I want to have lots of kids. And you can only have so many repeat cesareans.

So I’m planning on doing everything I can to work toward that end.

Diana Korte’s The VBAC Companion is the first resource I’ve picked up – and it’s a pretty good one. It outlines the case for VBAC, as well as the risks associated with it, and then goes right into how to plan for your VBAC.

The bulk of the book consists of finding a medical professional and a birthing location that are supportive of VBAC.

Turns out, the most important thing you can do to ensure success of your VBAC attempt is to have supportive attendants. Having a doctor or midwife who believes in VBAC, who has practices that support successful laboring (versus “trials of labor” that root against a woman), and who has successfully helped women have VBACs is HUGE.

The final part of the book was about laboring – mostly the general stuff you’d learn in any childbirth preparation class. How to manage pain and keep labor moving by moving around and assuming different positions. Which interventions help a woman to labor well and which slow or stop labor. Helpful things, but not ones unique to VBAC.

This was a good book on preparing for a VBAC. I would imagine that most women who want to attempt a VBAC will find it very useful.

I didn’t.

You see, I was hoping for something more. I was hoping for guidelines for physical fitness, exercises to do. I was hoping for weight gain guidelines. I was hoping for more specific laboring advice. Not that the other stuff isn’t important. I know the stuff this book discussed is the most important stuff for ensuring success. It’s just that I’m blessed to already have two extremely supportive attendants. I know that when I try again, my midwife and my OB are both rooting for me and are going to do everything in their power to help me to be successful.

So, I keep searching for that other stuff (I have a feeling I might not be able to find it in a book – so I’ve got a meeting scheduled with my midwife to talk about what she’s found to be helpful with other women).

Meanwhile, I can wholeheartedly recommend this book as a resource for other women who are hoping for a VBAC, especially for those who don’t know their OB, doctor, or midwife’s track record on VBAC and need help choosing a supportive professional.

Rating: 4 stars
Category: Pregnancy/Childbirth
Synopsis: Rationale for choosing a vaginal birth after cesarean and how to plan for a successful VBAC.
Recommendation: If you are interested in trying for a VBAC, this is a good resource.

Categories Book Reviews

Book Review: The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin

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“It’s a good book?” Daniel asks me, as the dozenth chuckle emerges from my lips. He’s stopped asking me what’s so funny, as the humor is lost without context.

Yes, it’s a good book. It’s a reader’s book. Full of references to other stories, calls to tropes, twists on standard tales. It’s a reflective book without being self-conscious.

I laughed. By the end, I cried.

The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry is about a bookseller, a widower with defined literary tastes who rather wants to run his bookstore to the ground while killing himself with drink. Now that Nic is dead, what has he to live for?

But a valuable book goes missing while he’s passed out drunk one night – and now his “insurance” is gone. It takes a stolen book, an unlikely friendship, and an abandoned child – but slowly, A.J. Fikry’s life starts to take on meaning again.

Each chapter opens with a book review of sorts: a blurb A.J. wrote about a book or a short story, hinting at what made that story important to him and worth reading to others. While I’d read only a few of the highlighted stories, Fikry’s descriptions were rich – and the connection between the stories he read and the stories he lived most interesting.

“It is so simple.
Maya…I have figured it all out–
The words you can’t find, you borrow.

We read to know we’re not alone.
We read because we are alone.
We read and we are not alone.
We are not alone.

My life is in these books–
Read these and know my heart.

We are not quite novels–
We are not quite short stories–
In the end, we are collected works.

This novel is sure to resonate with other readers as it resonated with me. I recommend it.

My recommendation is not without caveats, however. My readers will want to be aware that this book contains a few expletives and several instances of non-explicit sexual immorality.

Rating: 5 stars
Category: Literary fiction
Synopsis: Widowed bookseller A.J. Fikry is ready to give up on life when a stolen book, an unlikely friendship, and an abandoned child change his course completely.
Recommendation: A book lovers book – if your life has been changed by the stories you’ve read (and vice versa), you’re likely to enjoy this book.

Categories Book Notes

The Ideal Miss Trent

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A frequent charge leveled against romance novels is that they make you discontent with the husband you’ve got by setting up a paragon of a hero.

This may well be true, but I think I’m just as likely (or more so) to fall in love with the heroines.

Take Miss Trent from Georgette Heyer’s The Nonesuch:

“She was always very simply attired; but she wore the inexpensive muslins and cambrics which she fashioned for herself with an air of elegance; and never had he seen her, even on the hottest day, presenting anything but a cool and uncrumpled appearance.”

She was a self-sufficient woman, becoming first a schoolteacher and then a private governess-companion rather than live beholden to her brother. She was, of course, accomplished in the female arts that make one suited for such a post – but above that, she had that certain something that made her universally respected.

The daughter of the house worshipped her as a heroine, yes – but she also won over the low-born mother who had been determined to keep the governess in her place:

“She had been too much delighted to regain possession of her niece to raise any objection to the proviso that Miss Trent must accompany Tiffany; but she had deeply resented it, and had privately resolved to make it plain to Miss Trent that however many Generals might be members of her family any attempt on her part to come the lady of Quality over them at Staples would be severely snubbed. But as Miss Trent, far from doing any such thing, treated her with a civil deference not usually accorded to her by her children Mrs. Underhill’s repressive haughtiness was abandoned within a week; and it was not long before she was telling her acquaintance that they wouldn’t believe what a comfort to her was the despised governess.”

What’s more, Miss Trent was so above-reproach that she even won the respect of the self-absorbed heiress under her care:

“Tiffany took an instant fancy to the new teacher, who was only eight years older than herself, and in whose clear gray eyes she was swift to detect a twinkle. It did not take her long to discover that however straitened her circumstances might be Ancilla came of a good family, and had been used to move in unquestionably genteel circles. She recognized, and was a little awed by, a certain elegance which owed nothing to Ancilla’s simple dresses; and bit by bit she began to lend an ear to such scraps of worldly advice as Ancilla let fall at seasonable moments.”

Miss Trent is just the sort of person I could wish to be: always elegant, always genteel, universally liked, and capable of saying and doing just the right things at the right times.

But, alas, I am myself. And while I can work to stay cool and uncrumpled even on the hottest days, can work towards being genteel without being haughty, can seek to live in such a way as to be above reproach – I am still myself. I sweat and stress, I can be common, I fail.

The important part is not that I be the ideal Miss Trent (which I am not), but that God be seen as Perfect (which He is.)

Categories Book Notes

Cooking through Farmer Boy

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When I first became obsessed with Laura Ingalls Wilder’s “Little House” books, Farmer Boy and The Long Winter were tied for first place in my affections.

The Long Winter appealed to my love for stories telling of survival in the midst of adversity. Farmer Boy appealed to my love for food.

Whose mouth does not water as they read the description of those stacked pancakes, piled high with butter and maple sugar? Who does not long to be beside Almanzo, silently eating the sizzling ham, the stewed pumpkin, the mashed potatoes and gravy? And the pie, oh that pie!

I dreamed of the pies, of the ice cream, of the pound cake and taffy. I delighted in the descriptions of the familiar and wished to try the unfamiliar – Rye’n’Injun bread, apples’n’onions, wintergreen berries. Oh, how I wanted to try those.

Knowing that Farmer Boy was the next book in my re-reading of the series for Barbara’s Laura Ingalls Wilder Reading Challenge, I determined to cook up some of those toothsome meals.

Now, neither Daniel nor I are 19th century farmers and our calorie needs are significantly less than those of the Wilder family. Furthermore, Laura’s descriptions of the meals are often regarded to be hyperbolic, reflecting more food than even a well-off family like the Wilders would have at a typical meal. So I didn’t at all feel bad about paring the meals down to a more manageable size for our purposes.

We had fried ham, stewed squash (in lieu of stewed pumpkin), and mashed parsnips for our first meals – and then I read through chapter 2 again and discovered that it was mashed turnips they had rather than parsnips. Oh well, the parsnips were good – and I was reminded how much I like them.

We made twisted doughnuts (using the recipe in The Little House Cookbook) with lots of powdered sugar on top – and I decided that I liked the twisted technique even if it didn’t flip itself like Mother Wilder’s did. I think I’d like to try the technique again, only with a yeast dough (I prefer raised doughnuts in general.)

With our friend Ruth, we made stacked pancakes (with maple syrup instead of maple sugar), sausage patties in gravy, and apple turnovers.

I used the leftover pastry from the apple turnovers to make a pumpkin-pecan pie, which we ate with more ham and fried potatoes and apples’n’onions. I decided that apples’n’onions are amazing and I should cook them all the time (except that my husband only moderately likes them, so I should just cook them occasionally.)

I made baked beans using Mother Wilder’s technique – take boiled beans (I used Great Northern Beans), add salt pork (I used fatty bits left on the bone I’d boiled the beans with) and onions and green peppers, pour scrolls of molasses over top and bake at a low temperature for a long time. Daniel’s not usually a big fan of baked beans, but he actually liked these fairly well, especially after adding a bit of garlic powder and cayenne pepper. I’ll be using this as a jumping-off point to try to come up with a recipe he’ll really like for everyday use. With the baked beans, I served rye’n’injun bread (made using the recipe in The Little House Cookbook). I really enjoyed the flavor of rye and cornmeal together, but the bread ended up dry and dense (probably because of long cooking time at low temperature and not quite enough steam in my oven.) The next time I make cornbread, I’m going to try using my regular recipe but substituting rye flour for the wheat flour to make a modern-day Rye’n’Injun bread.

Finally, after the month was over, I got around to making roast beef and mashed potatoes with pan gravy, boiled turnips, and boiled carrots. I know I’ve had turnips before, but I was pleasantly surprised at the horseradishy flavor they have, and resolved to find more to do with turnips.

All in all, I ended up making some of the more mundane recipes from the book, holding off on all the pies and cakes and ice cream and taffy. And I discovered just how delicious meat and potatoes can be (and how many vegetables I forget exist.) Mother Wilder didn’t have fresh greens all through the winter, didn’t even have canned green beans or fruits. She had apples, onions, potatoes, turnips, carrots, and squash – but she used them again and again throughout the winter to provide her family with surprisingly fruit and vegetable heavy meals. I’m encouraged that I can do the same, using these root vegetables to round out my usual go-to frozen vegetables or fresh salads.

In addition to cooking from Farmer Boy, I did actually read it – and made some comments on the chapter on Springtime.

Head over to the wrap-up post for Barbara’s challenge to see what others have been reading, and what they’ve said about it.

Categories Book Notes

Where is the Heart of Darkness?

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Is it deep in Africa, along the nineteenth century Congo River?

Is it in the bronze people who drum and dance among those shores?

Perhaps it is in the uncivilized world in general – in Britain before the Romans conquered it.

Or maybe it is confined to Mr. Kurtz, that overpowering voice whose dark heart accomplished terrors along the aforementioned Congo.

Joseph Conrad suggests all of the above in his influential story The Heart of Darkness.

Marlowe, our narrator, introduces the idea that darkness might be a place when he opens his story by reflecting on the Thames:

“And this also,” said Marlowe, “has been one of the dark places of the earth.”

Again and again, Marlowe describes the encroaching forests along the bank of the Congo as an impenetrable darkness.

This, then, is darkness – unexplored, uncivilized places. These dark places infect the souls of the men within, turning them savage as the bronze men and their Mr. Kurtz.

It’s an appealing thought, that darkness is external.

Darkness is a place, free of civilization. Spend too much time isolated from civilization and you too will become dark.

But Marlowe’s story belies this interpretation, suggests a whole nother one.

Darkness is inside Mr. Kurtz. It is his passions that are the heart of darkness – the Congo only served to release his evil passions from the society that constrained them.

“They only showed that Mr. Kurtz lacked restraint in the gratification of his various lusts, that there was something wanting in him – some small matter which, when the pressing need arose, could not be found under his magnificent eloquence. Whether he knew of this deficiency himself I can’t say. I think the knowledge came to him at last – only at the very last. But the wilderness had found him out early, and had taken on him a terrible vengeance for the fantastic invasion. I think it had whispered to him things about himself which he did not know, things of which he had no conception till he took counsel with this great solitude – and the whisper had proved irresistibly fascinating. It echoed loudly within him because he was hollow at the core.”

I like this interpretation, like to recoil in horror at the blackness of Kurtz’s soul, at the hollow core which enabled him to perform such evil as he did. I like to think him some kind of psychopath, with unusual lusts and lack of restraint.

But the thought niggles at my mind, burrows deep and will not be satisfied. For is not the heart of darkness in me?

I do not make those around me worship me, do not go to any length to obtain treasure, do not openly obsess over my reputation and fame. But that is only because I do not have Mr. Kurtz’s eloquence, his ability to convince anyone to my greatness. That is only because I am not unrestrained by society and culture as Mr. Kurtz was. My heart is just as lustful, just as hollow, just as absolutely dark.

This is what I must conclude from Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness:

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”
~Jeremiah 17:9 (ESV)

and

“Cursed is the man who trusts in man
and makes flesh his strength,
whose heart turns away from the Lord.”
~Jeremiah 17:5 (ESV)