This is the next installment in a rather long series about how Daniel and I met–and have become engaged. Click on the “Our Story” tag for context.
It seems I had managed to render my dad speechless twice in the same night. First, when he had wondered if Daniel had already proposed-and now when I told him that, while Daniel had not yet proposed, he had told me he wanted to marry me.
When Dad recovered his power of speech, he advised me to get to know Daniel’s parents. After all, he said, it is from his parents that Daniel likely gets his idea of what a marriage looks like. It would behoove me to spend time with his family.
I recounted this story to Daniel later that week (yes, I told him everything-no coyness for this girl.)
After hearing my lively tale, Daniel said he might as well tell me what he was thinking of for a timeline.
“I’ve thought maybe we could spend time with each others’ families over the holidays…and then I’d propose in January or February and we’d get married sometime next summer.”
He paused a bit at this point. “You want a big church wedding, I’m guessing?”
“I’ve heard that those take at least six months to plan, so…”
He explained that a summer wedding makes the most sense to him, since his MBA work means he can’t just take off for a honeymoon in the middle of the school year.
He confessed that this timeline was already making him stressed. He felt maybe he was rushing things to be thinking of next summer–but he’d rather not have to wait all the way until summer of 2014.
I tried to reassure him, encouraged him not to stress about the timeline, not to feel rushed. People have gotten married during school for years. I told him we’d find a way to make it work if that’s the way it turned out.
I confessed to God in my journal:
“I love it. I love him. I love the way You’ve made him. And if things go according to his plan, I will rejoice. And if things work differently and we end up having to take just a weekend honeymoon or whatever, I will rejoice, because there will be a lifetime for knowing and loving him. And if we do not marry, I shall be grieved, but I will rejoice in God’s severe mercy in leading us elsewhere.”
I loved him-and very much wanted to marry him-but I did not want to make him an idol. I wanted God’s will even more than I wanted him, so even as I delighted in our continuing closeness, I was conscious to open my hand and offer him back to the Lord.
Whether we’d be married summer of 2013 or sometime in 2014 or not at all, I wanted God’s will to be done.
We got married over a Christmas break during my sr. year of college. :-) Actually it was my second senior year — it took me five years to get through and I only had 3 classes that last semester.
I appreciate the way you are guarding your heart, enjoying this time of life but keeping watching of idolatrous tendencies.