I hear it often enough that I sometimes feel like yelling.
“You’re not even showing,” they tell me – and I know they mean well. When the time comes that I look like I’ve swallowed a beach ball, I’ll be glad for the days when I “wasn’t even showing.”
Truth is, I weigh more than I’ve ever weighed in my life. My belly has definitely expanded. Baby jabs at me day in and day out. What do you mean I’m not even showing?
What makes it even odder is how those who know me well are absolutely certain that I AM showing. My sister tells me “Anyone who knows how stable your weight is has to know that you’ve been gaining.”
Which is probably what explains things. Those who know me and have seen me regularly know that this current weight, this current distribution of weight is far from normal for me – those who don’t see just an average looking woman (not necessarily a pregnant one.)
As frustrating as it can be to be disbelieved when I announce that I’m due in December, it really came in handy with one client I saw last week.
Now, I generally don’t discuss my own pregnancy with clients. They’re in my office to discuss their pregnancies – and while my own pregnancy can help me empathize, that doesn’t mean that they need to (or want to) know the details of my pregnancy.
But this young woman was in the first trimester of her first pregnancy and was nearly thrown into a panic when her friend told her she didn’t look pregnant.
I tried to reassure her that every woman is different and shows at different times – but that many women don’t show until the fourth month or so, especially in their first pregnancy.
My client tried to believe me, I could tell, but she was still worried.
I stood up and smoothed my skirt over my bump.
“I don’t know if you could tell,” I told her, “but I’m in my fifth month.”
Her jaw dropped open and she gasped. “You don’t LOOK pregnant,” she said.
Exactly my point.
She got it – and told me before she left that she’s looking forward to seeing me again once I do start showing.
I got the same comment when I was pregnant with my first. Second time around though I was showing quicker although I still got comments about how small I was.
I have had the opposite experience. People can’t refrain from telling me I’m a whale. And I’ve longed and wished for the comments YOU receive. :D Because the grass IS always greener on the other side!!!