A glimpse into my mind as the hour of my brother’s wedding draws near…
Jealous Matchmaker
In II Corinthians 11:2, Paul says “For I am jealous for you with godly jealousy. For I have betrothed you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ.”
I didn’t make the match between Debbie and Daniel, but I recognize this thought.
I threw Debbie a bachelorette party a couple of weeks back. As I planned it, I was appalled by the sorts of ideas that are generally seen as bachelorette party fare.
Yes, I wanted to embarrass Debbie. But I wanted to be able to present her as a chaste virgin to my brother. I was jealous that she not offer herself to anyone but him.
Preparing for the Wedding
Matthew 25:6-10
“And at midnight a cry was heard: ‘Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!’ Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ But the wise answered, saying, ‘No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.’ And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut.”
I’m a “prepare-for-every-eventuality” kind of gal–which makes me just the sort of person to be the last-minute-detail person. I’ve spent significant time considering every possibility and preparing for what might happen so that I can respond to any emergency without a problem. I have my “kit” packed up so that runs in hose, torn out hems, hair that won’t lay flat, cameras without batteries, and hungry attendants won’t cause problems for this wedding.
I won’t let what happened to these bridesmaids happen to me. I won’t be off running interference and miss the wedding. I’m prepared in advance because I want to be a full participant in this wedding.
My joy fulfilled in theirs
Jesus had come and was baptizing, and many of those who had previously been coming to hear John and be baptized now came to hear Jesus and be baptized by His disciples. John’s disciples are jealous for their leader’s following. In John 3, John the Baptist answers his disciples concern:
“He who has the bride is the bridegroom; but the friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly because of the bridegroom’s voice. Therefore this joy of mine is fulfilled. He must increase, but I must decrease.”
Daniel is the middle child in our family. He is four years younger than I. Yet he is the first to be married.
Am I melancholy about this?
Yes. A little.
I would have liked to have been first. In fact, we all kind of suspected that I would be first. But that isn’t what has occurred.
I think it’s always difficult for a single person to go to wedding after wedding, as friend after friend gets married and they remain single.
But the bit of envy I harbor is none so great as the joy I experience that my brother and my friend will be joined in marriage today.
I rejoice as I prepare for this wedding. I rejoice that today is THEIR day. I rejoice that today I can hear the bridegroom’s voice, my brother’s voice, as he gets closer and closer to the time he will be joined to his bride. I rejoice as I fuss over Debbie, preparing her for the time when she will be joined to my brother.
I am the friend. This is my joy.
I can celebrate as a jealous matchmaker, a prepared attendant, a friend of the bridegroom. The culmination of my “ministry” to them has come.
My name appears nowhere in this wedding’s order–I am not the focus. And that’s exactly as it should be.
I must decrease, they must increase. And this, this is my joy.