Ambitions, Fears, and Deep Existential Questions

AMBITIONS

Do you plan on being a musician/artist/writer?

I plan on being an amateur musician (whenever I can find the time to practice), playing the piano while my children sing along.

I plan to be an artist who works in imaginative media to make the lives of those around her beautiful.

I plan on being a writer–well, can’t you tell that I’m kinda into writing?

What age would you like to die?

120, having lived a very full life.

Or whatever time it please God.

How would you like to die?

I’d like to die like the one-hoss shay, where every part of me, having lived a long, full, productive life simply collapse and I die in a moment.

But if that can’t be, I suppose I’ll die in whatever way it please God.

Would you let your kids smoke weed?

What kind of question is that? Inasmuch as my will influences that decision, I will not let my kids smoke weed. But children have wills of their own, and don’t always do (or not do) what their parents would have them do (or not do.) I pray that God would restrain them from self-destructive habits such as this.

What do you want to be next Halloween?

I haven’t thought that far in advance, but maybe an astronaut or a ballet dancer or an old man. (I’ve done old woman before, but have never successfully cross-dressed. Maybe this year?)

If you could be any celebrity for one day, who would you be?

I think I would rather not live, even for a day, on someone else’s earthly fame. I would rather do something myself that would amplify God’s fame throughout all of eternity.

What do you wish your name was?

Cordelia.

NOT!

Actually, I’m quite pleased with Rebekah Marie (aka bekahcubed)

How old do you want to be when you get married?

21.

Hah!

Or whenever it please God.

What do you want to name your kids?

Girls? Bible place names like Bethel, Tirzah, Sharon, and Shiloh

Boys? Not sure about first names, but I’d love to have family names as middle names. For instance: William (my paternal grandmother’s maiden name), Ulrich (a paternal great-grandmother’s maiden name), Pierce (my maternal grandmother’s maiden name), or Nelson (a maternal great-grandmother’s maiden name)

What kind of hairstyle do you want?

For now, I’ll stick with what I’ve got.

For someday, whatever hairstyle pleases my husband

FEARS

Describe your most terrifying dream.
I have several…

…someone kidnapping my little brother John (back when he actually was little) and driving off with him down Superior street, despite me running after the pickup begging to have him back.

…an old woman grabbing my little brother John (who has always been incredibly full of life) and plunging his head beneath the water in a bathtub. She didn’t kill him, but he emerged a different person (with brain damage, I guess)–the life was gone from his face.

…the recurring one where I stood outside the gates of an enormous compound that the world thought was a spa. I stood there crying out “Don’t go in, don’t go in. There’s death behind those doors. It’s a trap.” But despite my warnings, friend after friend entered the compound. I went in to try to rescue them from certain death–and then I was running, running endlessly through the halls. I was chased and I was running, endlessly through the halls. Seeking my friends. Fearing my life. Fearing their lives even more. Running, running, endlessly until I awoke.

Are you afraid of the swine flu?

No, I’m not a pig, so I don’t really think about it much.

Do you get creeped out by puppets?

No. I love puppets and am disappointed that they’ve fallen out of vogue.

Sometime I should videotape some of my Mom’s puppet skits (particularly the one’s where Mom uses “Granny”). Such things should be preserved for future generations. “Land ‘sakes, child!”

Do you have any phobias?

Yes. I am afraid of being hung by my belly-button, of having someone cut my hair in my sleep, and of In-Vitro Fertilization.

Are you afraid to be yourself?

Only inasmuch as my self is sinful and totally depraved and wreaks havoc on those I love. Inasmuch as God has chosen to demonstrate His own nature through my self (imago dei), I am delighted to be myself (with all of my quirks and furbelows)

DEEP EXISTENTIAL QUESTIONS:

Are you happy in your life?

I think I am.

Do you feel like anything is missing? If so, what do you want?

I feel like something is missing. A husband, children. But God knows better than my feelings, and He has placed me here with this set of circumstances for His glory and my good.

Tell me a bit about yourself? What are you ambitions and fears? How would you answer these deep existential questions?