Book Review: French Twist by Catherine Crawford

Catherine Crawford was raising her children to be spoiled brats until she discovered, almost entirely by chance, that there was another way.

She had invited another family over for dinner and was shocked to find that this family’s kids were polite, helpful, and actually pleasant to be around.

This family happened to be French, which tickled the Francophile Crawford’s fancy, and next thing you know Crawford was trying a radical(ish) experiment in French parenting.

It’s just the sort of thing I usually like. A parenting memoir-slash-project memoir. Except I couldn’t make myself like Crawford, her children, or the French.

Now, I realize that Brooklyn parenting is a whole lot different than Middle-American parenting – but I find it hard to believe Crawford really needed to go French to learn that she is the boss (not her kids.) Just about anyone who works with children could tell her that structure works wonders for children. And the importance of family meals? Seriously? You didn’t know that?

Surely Crawford’s Catholic parents, having raised nine of their own children, could have told her that you don’t raise pleasant children by bargaining with them and rewarding them with toys every time they do something that most people would consider common courtesy. But no, Crawford must go French.

And then there’s how the French apparently actually parent. They drink alcohol while pregnant. They don’t breastfeed (at least, not for longer than three months). They shame their kids. Schoolteachers rank their students on a daily basis and announce those rankings to the class. Parents aren’t welcome at school. Their job is to make sure kids get homework done, period.

Eh, I’ll pass.


Rating: 2 stars
Category: Parenting Memoir
Synopsis: The author attempts to turn around her parenting by applying “French” advice.
Recommendation: I didn’t hate reading this, but I clearly didn’t like it either. Skip it.

Reading Lucy Maud

It’s that most wonderful time of the year – time to read Lucy Maud Montgomery with Carrie at Reading to Know.

Carrie has been hosting the Lucy Maud Montgomery Reading Challenge for the past 10 years – and I’ve had the pleasure of participating for at least 4 years (how is it possible it’s only that many?)

L. M. Montgomery Reading Challenge

As usual, the rule is to read as much Maud as possible during the month of January and to let the world know we’re participating (with a link to Carrie’s site).

Carrie includes a list of items that do NOT count toward the challenge (namely, the book Before Green Gables and the movies/shows Anne of Green Gables: The Continuing Story and Anne with an E. )

I’m going to push the limits of the challenge by reading a graphic novel version of Anne of Green Gables by Mariah Marsden, watching Tales from Avonlea, reading a couple of board books based on the Anne books (all from my library) – and reading one other of the Anne books (in original form). I haven’t decided which Anne book to read because I hate to start in the middle, but I think I’ve read Anne of Green Gables without reading the rest three or four times in a row now :-)

I’m looking forward to seeing what everyone else is reading!


12 years: a reading progress report

It’s been 12 years now since I began my epic project to read every book in my local branch library. 12 years, three cities, six homes, one husband, three biological children, and two foster children later… I’m still reading.

TOTALS as of Sept 5, 2018 (12 years or 4383 days)

Category Items this year Total Items Total Categories Closed
Juvenile Picture 165 1657 472
Juvenile, Board Books 365 512 268
Juvenile, First Readers 9 75 3
Juvenile, Chapter 0 92 7
Juvenile Fiction 6 320 25
Juvenile Nonfiction 19 280 1
Teen Fiction 1 49 4
Teen Nonfiction 0 5 0
Adult Fiction 3 468 71
Adult Nonfiction 34 953 44
Audio CD 238 933 14
Juvenile DVD 4 53 0
Adult Fiction DVD 8 107 7
Adult Nonfiction DVD 3 45 1
Periodicals 5 94 0
Total 860 items 5643 items
2.36 items/day 1.21 items/day

This year’s biggest reading accomplishment was getting serious about closing categories. The children and I read everything our library owns by 222 different board book authors. We have 8 more board books to read before we can say that we’ve read every board book in Wichita’s Advanced Learning Library!

Next up? We’re going to be hitting the picture books hard.


Laura Ingalls Wilder Reading Challenge Wrap-Up

I’m glad I set my expectations low for this year’s Laura Ingalls Wilder Reading Challenge – because we didn’t get far.

But Tirzah Mae and I read Little House in the Big Woods together during rest time. I had to convince her to put down the picture books so we could pick up Laura nearly every day – but, nearly every day, she tried to convince me to keep reading Laura when I came to the end of the chapter. So I’m going to call it a win.

She asked me to re-read “the part where Aunt Ruby and Aunt Docia are fixing their hair” several times and named Louis’s doll “Charles” after Pa. The harmonica was renamed as a fiddle, all the better to play “Buffalo Girls” with. We played with a balloon like Laura and Mary played with the pig’s bladder (although Tirzah Mae and Louis had a harder time sharing the balloon than Laura described her and her sister having!)

I occasionally wondered how much Tirzah Mae was understanding, but the things she talked about indicated that she understood more than I thought. I’ve also come to realize that some of the beauty of this first volume is its episodic quality. The seasons of the year (from the onset of one winter to autumn of the next year) provide structure for the book, but there is no overall narrative arc that one must understand. So if Tirzah Mae doesn’t understand churning butter? No problem. She’ll learn later and will still be able to enjoy the dance at Grandpa’s house.

I interviewed Tirzah Mae briefly this morning (about a week after we finished) to hear her thoughts on the book.

Which part do you remember?
The bear

Was there one bear or two bears?
One bear

What was the other one?
The stump of a bear

What did papa do?
He’s not papa, he’s pa.

So, what did pa do?
I don’t know. Hit it with a stick.

Should we read Laura again next year?
No… Just today.

I think it’s safe to say that we’ll be revisiting Laura in the future :-)

Thanks to Barbara for providing the impetus to continue reading and re-reading Laura year after year!

Postscript: Louis also enjoyed a few of the “My Little House books” books – and I caught a great photo of him perusing one here.


We love Laura

“We’re going to get some more books about Laura from the library,” I told Tirzah Mae.

“With Pa and Ma and Mary and Carrie?” she asked.

I answered yes.

Tirzah Mae knows and loves Laura and Ma and Pa and Mary and Carrie from the “My First Little House Book” Christmas in the Big Woods, which we had in our Christmas basket this year.

But our trip to the library only yielded three “My First Little House Books” – and of those three, two were about Almanzo rather than Laura. I sought to relieve Tirzah Mae’s obvious disappointment by promising that we could get mama’s Laura book from the basement and read it together.

It was already late and mama was busy with other things when we got back from the library, but Tirzah Mae reminded me of my promise again and again until, the next morning, we finally went down to the basement to get Little House in the Big Woods.

We started reading right away, reading the first part of the first chapter, until just before the pig butchering.

We were reading – are reading – Laura for Barbara H’s Laura Ingalls Wilder Reading Challenge.

I’ve also checked out a number of new-to-me children’s biographies of Laura, but I don’t know how much I’ll be able to read of them since my personal reading time is limited and Daniel and I have a couple books we’re trying to work our way through together.

However much we manage to get through, I’m so glad to join Barbara again for this challenge (the sixth year participating in the challenge and my second year participating with Tirzah Mae).

Because we love Laura.


Nightstand (January 2018)

I’m late to the party for this month’s nightstand – and nearly all my books were actual read LAST MONTH. I’d checked them out of the library thinking I might have time to read while breastfeeding, but then I ended up reading them during that interminably long 2 week period between Beth-Ellen’s due date and when she actually showed up. Breastfeeding time has indeed ended up being quite fruitful on the reading front, but the reading has been almost entirely picture books. Tirzah Mae and Louis and I snuggle up and read five or ten or twenty picture books each day while I breastfeed Beth-Ellen (which is wonderful, but not so impressive for my nightstands :-P)

Books for Growing

  • Honey for a Woman’s Heart by Gladys Hunt
    It’s hard to categorize a book on books, but I’m going to call this one a book for growing. Hunt gives an apologetic for reading (and reading a variety of genres), but the real strength of this book is the mini-reviews on every page. I added quite a few books to my TBR list, particularly in the “Books for Seeing” (the world clearly) and “Books for Enjoying” categories – two categories that I often find myself struggling in (because I either get lost in fiction and feel it not particularly worth the time once I’m done or I get slogged down in “literary” reading that doesn’t fit well with my stage of life as a mother of very young children.)

Books for Knowing

  • The Girls of Atomic City by Denise Kiernan
    A fascinating look at the massive secret city built practically from scratch to enrich uranium for the original atomic bomb. As the title suggests, this is primarily a look at the women who traveled from near and far to live in and staff this giant government undertaking. I put this on my “To Be Read” list way back in 2015 after reading Susan’s review – but once I started it, I just devoured it. It’s an excellent story, well-told. Take a look at Barbara H’s review for a more fleshed-out description of the story.

Books for Enjoying

  • Pride, Prejudice, and Cheese Grits by Mary Jane Hathaway
    I read this based on Barbara H’s review and was so glad I did. Ms. Hathaway manages to avoid the twin pitfalls adaptations of great literature often fall into: either slavishly following the original story such that the adaptation adds nothing or taking such liberties with the storyline and characters that one can only wonder whether the author of the adaptation cares anything for the original work. Pride, Prejudice, and Cheese Grits pays clear homage to Jane Austen’s work while managing to be unique. I also appreciated how the author has the main character, Shelby, (who is a Christian) act Christianly. Shelby prays for wisdom (or, just as often, for forgiveness when she acts unwisely), relates her life circumstances to things she’s reading in the Bible, and wonders about God’s purpose in things. The characterization was authentic without being preachy, something I don’t often see. I am greatly looking forward to reading more of Ms. Hathaway’s Austen adaptations.

Other

  • All Natural by Nathanael Johnson
    I couldn’t figure out how to categorize this book. The subtitle “A skeptic’s quest to discover if the natural approach to diet, childbirth, healing, and the environment really keeps us healthier and happier” made me think this would fit my “books for knowing” category. But, given that this was published by Rodale, I should perhaps have had a clue that the author is less skeptical than the cover would suggest – and that the content would be less science-based than I’d have liked. It was enjoyable to read about Johnson’s exploration of the “natural” arguments and the “technological” arguments on a variety of issues, but the book was long on feelings and short on evidence.

Don’t forget to drop by 5 Minutes 4 Books to see what others are reading this month!

What's on Your Nightstand?


Book Review: No Milk! by Jennifer A. Ericsson, illustrated by Ora-Eitan

Reviewed by Tirzah Mae:

“There was no milk because he didn’t know that you need to squeeze the cow’s udders for the milk to come out. Because he was a city boy.”

No Milk!

And that’s the gist of it.

Truly a delightful little book, although it isn’t quite as explicit as Tirzah Mae’s explanation makes it sound. Parents of city boys and girls (like my own city-born Tirzah Mae) will have to explain why all the things the city boy tried resulted in “No milk!” and why “A little pat? A little squeeze? A little tug? Could it be?” finally produced milk.

A favorite of Tirzah Mae and Louis alike (and I don’t hate it, so there’s that.)


Reading the Bible as a Book

I’ve been following Peter Krol’s Knowable Word blog for a while now – and he’s been reviewing some of the now-intensely-popular reader’s Bibles.

I’ve been curious about them, but nothing I read was enough to convince me to get yet another Bible. After all, Daniel and I already have an entire shelf full of Bibles.

Beth-Ellen and I snuggle as I read my Bible in the morning.

Beth-Ellen and I snuggle as I read my Bible in the morning

But then Krol reviewed the NIV Sola Scriptura Reader’s Bible. His absolutely glowing review convinced me. I had some gift money that had been sitting around waiting for just the right thing to strike my eye – so I bought myself a copy.

I read in the morning as I nurse Beth-Ellen. I read until I reach a natural break in the narrative. I start over if I get lost in the middle of a paragraph. I read page after page after page, without thinking of checking off chapters and verses.

I read it like I’d read a book.

The rest of the children join us in bed - putting an end to the reading!

The rest of the children join us in bed – putting an end to the reading!

Game changer.


Book Review: For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage by Tara Parker-Pope

What makes for a good marriage? What combination of inborn traits, behaviors, and life circumstances makes for marital longevity and bliss?

Sure, there are plenty of people willing to opine based on their personal experiences with marriage, or perhaps on their experiences counseling married couples or divorcees. But what does the science say?

Ostensibly, that’s what Tara Parker-Pope set out to explore in For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage.

And, if you do a cursory reading of her book, you’ll come to certain conclusions about the best marital model. Mainly, you’ll come to think that an egalitarian, 50-50 marriage is the way to go. It is clearly the best option. That is, if you fail to read page 254 carefully. There, a couple of paragraphs belie the drumbeat of “egalitarian is best” to which the entire rest of the book marches:

“It’s often a surprise when people learn that a traditional marriage, which is marked by the male breadwinner/female homemaker roles, is widely viewed as the most stable marriage. It had the lowest divorce rate in the studies by Dr. Hetherington. But just because these marriages are stable doesn’t mean they always are the most happy.

For a traditional marriage to thrive, both partners have to be happy with their individual role, perform it well, and feel respected by the other partner for the contributions they make to the marriage and family. If one partner changes, particularly if the wife decides she wants to work outside the home, the marriage can be stressed, often beyond repair.”

I love how shocked Parker-Pope is (and how she attributes her own shock to “people”) that experts on marriage stability regard the traditional marriage to be the most stable model (you know, based on things like… data.) I also love how quickly she jumps to discredit that result. I mean, it may be the most stable, but clearly one couldn’t actually be, you know, happy in a marriage like that.

When I read that second paragraph, I can’t help but think that the things she’s arguing make for a happy traditional marriage are things that make for a happy marriage altogether. Even if both spouses work, they will be happiest if both are happy with their individual role, perform it well, and feel respected by the other partner for the contributions they make to the marriage and family. And if one partner changes, perhaps maybe if a woman decides she wants to stay at home with the children? The marriage is stressed – not necessarily by the desire, but by the change in family dynamics that must be navigated before a new equilibrium is reached.

Now, does this mean that Parker-Pope’s book is not worth reading? Not really. I found it to be interesting. It sparked lots of conversation with my husband (always a nice thing whether or not the topic of discussion is marriage – but it’s especially nice when a book about marriage enables conversation with your spouse.) There was other information that is applicable even if you reject the pervasive belief that egalitarianism is the best model for marriage (for instance, did you know that couples with MORE conflict tend to have stronger marriages? It’s really in how conflict is brought up and managed that makes the difference.)

I don’t think this is a great book to read if you feel like your marriage is in trouble. It’s not terribly practical in that regard. I also don’t think it quite succeeds at the subtitle’s aim of discussing “the science of a good marriage” (given its failure to look any deeper at the most stable model of marriage – the two paragraphs above are literally ALL that is said about traditional marriage.) But if you’re like me, in a happy and functional marriage and eager to continue learning and growing within that marriage, I think this could still be beneficial (or at least interesting).


Rating: 3 stars
Category: Marriage
Synopsis: Attempts to discuss what the science says about successful marriages (that don’t end in divorce), but without really regarding a traditional marriage as a viable option (and therefore leaving out an entire area of inquiry that seems rather important to this reader.)
Recommendation: Interesting information, probably not helpful for a struggling marriage.


My brother, the pumpkin runner?

It didn’t take long, when reading Marsha Diane Arnold’s The Pumpkin Runner, to find parallels between her main character and my brother Josh.

First, there’s the name. “Nearly all the sheep ranchers in Blue Gum Valley rode horses or drove jeeps to check on their sheep. But Joshua Summerhayes…”

Then there’s the running. “But Joshua Summerhayes liked to run…” Yep, that’d be Josh.

Finally, there’s Joshua’s penchant for eating raw pumpkin.

Not that my brother Josh is crazy about raw pumpkin (at least, I don’t think he is). But when I read:

“That was the year his family planted a pumpkin patch behind their clapboard ranch house, where the sun sparkled through the eucalyptus trees near Blue Gum Creek.

When the pumpkins had grown as round as a wombat’s belly, young Joshua stopped by to enjoy a golden slice.”

When I read that passage (from the second and third paragraphs of the story), I remembered my brother Joshua’s love for raw green beans. Now, don’t get me wrong. We all loved to munch on the raw green beans while we spent countless hours stemming for mom to can. But Josh took it to a whole ‘nother level. We teased that Josh ate more than went into his bowl to be canned.

The Pumpkin Runner goes on from there, of course. It tells the story of young Joshua Summerhayes, young no longer. At 60 years old, he’s still running powered by the pumpkins in the patch out back. But when a newspaper announces a run from Melbourne to Sydney (just 900 km or ~560 miles), Joshua tells his dog: “It’s been a while since we’ve visited the city, Yellow Dog…. We could see two cities and get in a little run as well.” And so they did – Joshua in his orange gumboots, Yellow Dog beside him, and Aunt Millie driving from stop to stop with pumpkin treats as fuel.

I’m not sure Tirzah Mae was as impressed with the story as I was – it was a bit long and she had her eye on a Barbie easy reader she’d picked up the last time we were at the library (groan!) But I sure enjoyed envisioning my brother, 30 years down the line, running a long distance race fueled by raw green beans.

I’ll be Aunt Millie, driving the Jeep.

:-P